Can you remember the time when you were down to nothing? When you just could not figure out why things are happening? When you thought you’ve done everything you could and you’ve exhausted every possible way to decipher the circumstances that seem to be a giant puzzle or maze? When you lay at night and your tears were your companion, your own sobs were your lullabies? And you woke up in the morning thinking that the misty sunlight would melt your cold countenance, as cold as ice, and that the chirping of birds would soothe the cruel reality around you. When all the right things you have known in all your existence had become wrong to their sight, and you had no other choice but to succumb yourself in what you think is the most hopeless and helpless moment of your life. When you had nothing, basically nothing, to think of but pain, disappointment, dismay, and heartbreak.
The years pass. And the sequence of the story becomes acquainted to you. There are questions that, until now, have not been answered yet. They remained as they are. They linger in your thoughts. And you think that life is a never-ending cycle of hurts, injustice, and imprisonment in what you see is a harsh bondage for a free-spirited soul like you. Harshness, yes, an echo that has been reverberating within the walls of your soul, a familiar word that has been repeating in the history of your life.
Now you wonder, What have I become? Am I now living the life that I have always thought of, dreamed of? What have I learned? Did something new happen? If there was, what changed? Am I still living in void? Is there a light in a tunnel? When will I see it? When can I be filled with hope that had always escaped my grip? When can life be better? And there you are, thinking that your life is like a spinning game wheel that doesn’t stop spinning, and when it does, it always points to “Failure.”
Now, take heart, little one, you’re not alone! Everybody goes through this phase at least once in their lives. The only difference it has in everybody is that, one can recognize that the earth cannot stop orbiting the sun (Otherwise we’re dead fo sho!), while others just cannot.
Let me give you a simple story of science. (No please, I can make it simple, see, I’m trying.) Our beloved planet constantly revolves around that giant ball of fire. For 365 1/4 days, it does not get tired of doing so. Not mentioning the fact that it is spinning around its own axis at the same time! (As a child, I would always wonder why we’re not feeling dizzy at all. Until my science teacher enlightened me, thanks to her.) But that was just a portion of an era of questions in my snoopy mind as a youngster: Why doesn’t the earth fall down from the solar system? How come the planets don’t juggle around? And, why is the earth the third planet from the sun? Why not first? Things like that. After less than a score of years, I have learned that the earth does fall! [Bhatia, A. (2014). What Would Happen if the Earth Stopped In Its Orbit? Retrieved 8 November 2015, from http://www.wired.com/2014/12/empzeal-earthfall/] Isaac Newton found it out. It wouldn’t have been held as a precious knowledge until today unless it isn’t true and isn’t actually happening! Physics is accountable for the explanation and it has something to do with speed, temperature, gravity, etc. If not for the factual “earthfall”, we are all thrown into the sun! And we all know what happens next. The gem here is the fact that the earth falls everyday, every minute, in a whole year, in all the years to come, until our earthly time is through, so that it can keep us all alive.
These, with all the interconnections this earthfall has with the human lives thriving on this planet, with all the hustles and bustles of our everyday, with all of our movements, our busyness and many businesses, our personal journeys, out-and-abouts, shenanigans, merrymakings, with all our human concerns, struggles, and existence, with all our own trials and downfalls and failures, with all our pain, our grievances, our sorrows, with all the heartbreaks, hopelessness, doubts, frustrations, our cries, with our own loneliness, feelings of injustices, all the regrets, loss, chaos and hate, with death and war, are all needed and necessary. It is a hard truth but it is the truth. They are all inevitable, inescapable. All those pain are needed not to destroy us, but because life is meant to be lived. And accepted. And give us the purpose of existence. Life is when all you can see is the facade of an ugly reality but in the depth of it is beauty and perfection and hope and love, and happiness. Life is when all you can carry is the heavy weight over your shoulders but all it meant is to put both of your feet on the ground, to make your feet stand on the ground. Steadily. Unwaveringly. Life is when you see bleakness and gloom, when later on the clouds will part ways and reveal the radiant light. Life is when all you can utter are cries and wailing but all it meant is to make your knees fall to the ground and utter words of prayers and hope. Life is when all you can feel is pain, when what it meant is to shower you with love and faith. It is when you touch nothing but your shadows, and all it wanted to reveal, all throughout those years is His presence, God’s loving presence, by your very side, every minute, everyday, in a whole lot of year, forever. Life is the reality of His unending love and care and affection, that goes throughout the ages and reaches a thousand generations. Life is love. And life is His expression of this love. Love that is unseen, but is perfectly beautiful and incomparable, and worth all His pain, His cries, His death on the cross for YOU. And yes, His love that can wipe away your tears, that can renew your frail soul, that can create a new heart in your very being, that can give a new life. And this love, yes, the reason for your existence in this constantly falling and fallen world, that no matter how far or how fast this earth could fall, you would not be thrown away into that fiery land of wailing and hopelessness and nothingness. All because of His love, all because of Jesus!
Now, that you are in a new season and time, now is the chance to pursue that flickering light at the end of the tunnel. Once, all you knew was darkness and pain, now you are orbiting in His own pace and timing, kept safe and secured in His hands that are so gentle and comforting. Yes, you can still fall. And fail. But just like the earth, you will fall safely, timely, securely, because those Magnificent Hands hold everything, just everything, in its place so perfectly and lovingly. 🙂
Don’t be afraid of falling!