“And for the second place, contestant number 11!”
I couldn’t believe my ears. I glanced at the ribbon on my uniform that says “11“. As I walked toward the stage, my ears grew hot and I felt that they blushed while my head was constantly telling me, “Yes, you won.”
Years passed and that winning moment was succeeded by another, and then another one, until I reached my senior year in high school. Each time I would hear the announcing of successful competitors, my heart would pound as if a hammer was nailing something into it: “I told you, you could do it.”
After all those years, however, I did not become a writer. It seems to me that those events gave me only a hint on what I should be doing. Rather, I became an agent of Science that looks at the different smallest forms of life on earth under some intelligent binoculars called the microscope. I take care of organisms called bacteria and make them propagate in certain media, and yes, they are the nasty ones that have plagued the higher forms of living beings ever since time began. I have also learned the mechanism that dictates how we should uniquely look like- the power of the DNA. And why, they are all awesome and magnifique! They have always left me fascinated to a great extent and made me realize that indeed, creation is inexplicably beautiful and amazing.
To me, fate is subtle and cunning. One might think of the ends but the means are in fact a way of getting us directed to a different path. The odds sometimes get in the scene and before we know it, we are in another era of self-searching. Sadly, sometimes we couldn’t beat those odds and we are thrown in a maze of confusion and they get us walking around in circles for so long a time. We rant about our complacency and vincible ignorance in the past and now regret it. And here goes the essential question, “How do we head towards our destiny?”
It is a question that I myself have pondered on for years. I never knew or at least expected that I would be who I have become. Too often I wonder about the purpose as to why I have this disposition. But as much as I ask, through the years, I have been finding the reason I need in order for me to believe that I am where I perfectly ought to be. That reason is substantiated by an ultimate reason itself: God.
Everything happens for a reason. It also goes to say that everything happens for God. For He is the reason Himself. It is His greatest plan that we are where we are. Though I did not become a writer, I am a writer by heart. Though I did not earn it by name or title, God has intertwined it with my walk of life. And though it is not my profession, I do it wholeheartedly and sincerely in and out of season.
It is important for me to express even every inkling that I have in mind. At first I thought if this was normal for me lest I look so divergent and too idealistic. But then I realized that when God has deposited something in your heart, it just can’t be suppressed or hidden; it has to be spoken out. What makes it different and precious is the passion that fuels this freedom of expression. For when you love what you do, it is not a duty per se anymore, but becomes a willful response to the innate calling instructed to you even before you realized it.
I do believe that we have different callings from God. Using it for His glory is the main purpose of this calling. It is true that whatever He started in us He will bring into completion. He is, after all, a God who doesn’t change His mind and His plan. Everything that happened in the past is a prerequisite of our present and an introduction of our future. So I equally believe that the story is not finished yet. It is in fact a start of another chapter, just as it has always been. There are changes, transformations, realizations along the way and I hold on to the fact that even though changes are constant in this world, His plan for me is never altered nor does it deviate. That is when I learned how to reach the destiny I have been looking for: Life goes on according to His will.